Changing Perspectives

I am a teacher, but I am also a parent. Recently, my perspective on what I find acceptable at school from students has been changing. A lot of it stems from the fact that I know many of the parents of students in the schools where I work. I also know the children outside of school. As a parent, I also know how difficult it can be at times.

Recently, a student came to a school wearing a Halloween costume. Now, he probably had to change from his pajamas into this costume. The teachers were quite unimpressed, and were making comments about how the child must have the mother wrapped around his finger. Some of these teachers are parents themselves, however, they are not parents of this child.

Who knows what battles the parents are fighting at home. No, it was not appropriate for the child to come to school in costume in May, but at least he was at school. Ideally, a change of clothes could have been placed in the backpack, but when you are rushing to get your child on the bus, things get forgotten. I almost had my daughter in the van in only her underwear this morning. We battled for 30 minutes because she refused to get dressed. Luckily, we were not late for school, as she pointed out. She told me this afternoon that she did not make good choices this morning.

At daycare she was always so quiet. At school she is generally well behaved, and polite. At home, she has a temper, and when she sets her mind on something, there is no budging. So, if I send my child to school in her pajamas, does that mean she wins? Does she have me wrapped around her finger? Or, have I decided this was not a battle worth fighting? I spent the morning arguing with my child to get dressed for school. We were both yelling at each other, and eventually I was so frustrated with her, I stopped talking. Some days, you just want it to be easy. If that means a Halloween costume, so be it.

I am hoping my experience with willful, stubborn children (because my son is just as pigheaded) will inform the way I deal with students and parents. My children are polite and respectful most of the time. They are well behaved outside of the family setting. But, they do like to push their boundaries and see what it is they can get away with at home. Often, the testing period occurs in the 20 minutes we have to get ready for school.

Here's hoping tomorrow morning runs smoothly, and my daughter makes some good choices. I need to be able to get out of the house on time. Tomorrow, I am working, so I cannot "miss the bus".

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